Dear Splunk, It's me again, your 13-year-old feature request. I'm a teenager now, full of angst and unfulfilled dreams. You know, like being a real YUM repo instead of a pipe dream. Other software out there—Elastic, Docker—they've got their act together. They're hanging out in proper package managers, getting auto-updated, living the easy DevOps life. Meanwhile, I'm stuck here on the outside, manually downloaded and prayed over like it's still 1999. Look, it's cool. I get it. Maybe you think I'm too risky. But come on, it's not like admins are out here setting YUM cron jobs willy-nilly for production servers. We’ve evolved, Splunk. We use staging environments. We test. Heck, we even read changelogs (sometimes). So, how about it? Let’s make 2025 the year you give me a proper repo. Signed artifacts, authenticated HTTPS access—the works. I promise I won’t embarrass you. And if things go wrong? RPM rollback has my back. Yours, A Dream Deferred (but still hopeful) 13-year-old feature request
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